The Art of Disconnecting and Reconnecting
by Jesslyn Marie
published in Issue No. 4: January/February 2020
Image by Jesslyn Marie.
One of the most frequently asked questions I get about solo backpacking is how to keep from getting bored. It comes up a lot in online forums, and the most common answers I see from others are podcasts, audiobooks, e-books, phone games, etc. My own answer is simple: be bored. This is not the most popular antidote to hear when you’re wanting to keep your mind occupied while solo camping, but it has the potential to be one of the most beneficial.
In our daily, civilized lives, we’re used to being bombarded by all sorts of media, competing for our attention: commercials, TV shows, online ads, billboards, street-side signs, promotions, social media, emails. We’ve become so used to this constant barrage of information with little regard towards how it affects us. Take a moment and think about the last week in your life. How many of us picked up our phone and started to open something without thinking about it, lost track of time while perusing various apps, or had a twinge of panic when we couldn’t immediately identify where our mobile device was? Don’t feel bad, this is exactly what they are designed to do: to leave us wanting more and to continue to depend upon them. We’ve become accustomed to distraction and, while we may feel like we are more connected to others, we’ve become quite disconnected from ourselves.
There are many reasons why each of us seek the sanctity of the wilderness. An underlying reason I’ve found is that we all need some kind of reset, disconnecting from the chaos and rigors of everyday life and reconnecting with the natural world for a sense of peace and calm. It’s a reminder that life isn’t always about rushing around and that we’re allowed to take several steps back and just be, even if only for a little while. Take another moment now and think about the last time you sat down somewhere, alone, without any external distractions. No phone, no book, not even another person to have a conversation with— just you and your thoughts. It can be a scary thing for a lot of people!
The first time I did a solo trip, I was a bit worried about this. It was winter, so the sun would go down a lot earlier and that meant I would be wide awake in my tent for hours after it was dark. What the heck would I do with all that time? Without something to occupy our minds, we start to feel uncomfortable and we, as human beings, do not like to be uncomfortable and so we try to “fix” it. I was uncomfortable in a plethora of ways and simply had to make do with what I had. Physical discomfort was more or less easily soothed with layers, hand warmers, and my sleeping bag, but the mental discomfort was much more difficult to deal with. I found myself wanting to play a video game or wishing that I had someone else to share in the misery of this whole experience— a quick fix to my loneliness in that moment. “Solo backpacking in the winter… honestly, Jess. What a dumb idea.”
Image by Jesslyn Marie
It took some time, but I started to accept my self-inflicted predicament and genuinely appreciate it for what it was. The stillness of everything was other-worldly. No bugs, no critters, no moving water, no precipitation, no wind, no nothing. It was the most beautifully eerie and complete silence I had ever heard (or not heard?), and I was mesmerized by it. Likewise, this was my first time solo backpacking and my first time winter backpacking (a true double whammy), in a place that is absolutely bustling with life and traffic in the summer months, and I had it utterly to myself. The next morning was one of the most magical moments, with the pristine, snowy landscape sparkling like diamonds in the sleepy pink and blue hues of dawn. I was the only one to experience it, precisely in that moment, never to be experienced in that exact way again by anyone. Displeasure and unease had transformed literally overnight into pure gratitude and contentment. Imagine what a different experience that would have been had I allowed myself to filter it through a screen.
I very intentionally leave needless distractions at home and bring only something that will enhance my experience of being mindfully present, such as a pocket journal or a miniature art set. Something that, technically speaking, keeps me from getting “bored” in the literal sense of the word but helps me to further focus on my immediate surroundings and why I am there in the first place. Sometimes, though, I don’t bring even that. Much like when we were children, and our parents would tell us to “go outside,” we let our imaginations take over and we found something out of nothing.
The one thing I look forward to most is sitting by a lake for a couple of hours and existing in that moment. The feel of the sun, wind, or rain on my bare face, the smell of the alpine wildflowers and pine trees, the sound of rushing water or buzzing bees. I’ll let my feet take me off-trail to crest a ridge or circle around a lake, gaining a sense of kinship with the new-to-me landscape, taking care to notice easily overlooked details and drinking in the views. For these reasons, and so many more, solo backpacking has become my favorite thing in the world.
Self-reflection for a couple of days has a funny way of changing your perspective, both in the moment as well as when you return to the humdrum of everyday life, and that is exactly why I challenge others to simply be bored. Sit with your fears and discomfort. Be wholly present. Let go and connect— most especially with yourself. I’ll give no illusions that it is easy, and it sometimes still isn’t for me, but many things worth doing are not. It’s the best reset button I’ve found to date, and my genuine hope is that others can find success with this approach, too. Happy adventures— and self-discovery— my friends!
Jesslyn Marie is a Bozeman-based photographer and avid outdoor enthusiast, combining these two passions into adventure elopements. Check out her work or get in touch with her on Instagram (@jesslynmariephoto) or visit her website for more info (www.jesslynmarie.com)